Thinking, emotions and actions are all connected and affect each other
It is difficult to influence your mood or emotions just by willpower. Some emotions are easy to experience as good and positive. For example feelings of joy, love, enthusiasm and acceptance release energy and everything feels good - for people with these feelings, everything is smooth and easy. Difficult emotions are usually the ones we have a negative attitude towards. For example anger, disgust, shame, fear, pain and feelings of failure are emotions that are often difficult to accept. However, all emotions are equally important. Experiencing feelings of inadequacy and mood swings are a part of life and important to our overall mental health. However, too much negative emotion can be difficult to cope with.
It is difficult to influence your mood or emotions just by willpower. Some emotions are easy to experience as good and positive. For example feelings of joy, love, enthusiasm and acceptance release energy and everything feels good - for people with these feelings, everything is smooth and easy. Difficult emotions are usually the ones we have a negative attitude towards. For example anger, disgust, shame, fear, pain and feelings of failure are emotions that are often difficult to accept. However, all emotions are equally important. Experiencing feelings of inadequacy and mood swings are a part of life and important to our overall mental health. However, too much negative emotion can be difficult to cope with.
Like physical health, mental well-being and mental health skills can be strengthened through everyday choices and working with one’s own thoughts. Physical health and mental health go hand in hand. Understanding one’s own resources and emotional skills is a good foundation for self-awareness and good mental health. Seeing and understanding one’s own feelings also helps to perceive the feelings of others, which is an essential part of living and working with others. For example, stress management and self-compassion are important mental health skills. Good mental health creates a foundation for enjoying life, feeling meaningful, and experiencing yourself as a valued member of the community. Emotions vary during the day, but your overall mood is a longer lasting state.
You can start taking care about your mental health by asking yourself: How am I doing?
Be kind to yourself, but also persevere. Encourage yourself as if you were encouraging your best friend. Life includes ups and downs, good and bad feelings, sometimes you will feel lost, you will make mistakes but you are also learning. Ask yourself: What is the best way to act and solve problems? Do I stay as a prisoner of my feelings or can I be compassionate to myself?
Check out Nyyti’s Life Skills Course (in Finnish): The purpose of the course is to give insights about what makes a meaningful and good everyday life for you. The course does not provide “the right answers”: You know the solutions for yourself and only you can find them. You can always ask someone for help on difficult topics.
For more about wellbeing take a look at the Hand of Mental Health (pdf) and page on Coping skills (pdf). About emotions see Nyyti. For more reading on mental health see FSHS - Finnish Student Health Service. About mental disorders and seeking help see Finnish Association for Mental Health Mieli and Tuntuu.fi page: Help. About strength, compassion and self-care to go through the pandemic see Mieli.
For more about wellbeing take a look at the Hand of Mental Health (pdf) and page on Coping skills (pdf). About emotions see Nyyti. For more reading on mental health see FSHS - Finnish Student Health Service. About mental disorders and seeking help see Finnish Association for Mental Health Mieli and Tuntuu.fi page: Help. About strength, compassion and self-care to go through the pandemic see Mieli.
What kind of person am I?
The fact that you like yourself, even if you are not perfect, is a sign of good self-esteem. Good self-esteem makes it easier to treat yourself and others gently and acceptingly. When you have good self-esteem, you can appreciate your good and bad qualities. Additionally, you trust yourself and have the ability to value others, too. A person with good self-esteem can persevere after a failure, instead of getting anxious - and is able to ask for help too.
Self-esteem is an important feature, but it is just one among many others. Self-esteem can be strengthened and it can also vary at different stages of life. Strong self-esteem can bring a sense of life-control and independence. However, self-esteem is more than just confidence: a shy or quieter person may have very good self-esteem, whilst a loud and sociable person may actually have low self-esteem. In order to develop good self-esteem you need to get to know yourself properly, as good self-knowledge is the basis for good self-esteem. It is also important to consider when it may be useful to work on developing a personal characteristic that could help improve your self-esteem.
The fact that you like yourself, even if you are not perfect, is a sign of good self-esteem. Good self-esteem makes it easier to treat yourself and others gently and acceptingly. When you have good self-esteem, you can appreciate your good and bad qualities. Additionally, you trust yourself and have the ability to value others, too. A person with good self-esteem can persevere after a failure, instead of getting anxious - and is able to ask for help too.
Self-esteem is an important feature, but it is just one among many others. Self-esteem can be strengthened and it can also vary at different stages of life. Strong self-esteem can bring a sense of life-control and independence. However, self-esteem is more than just confidence: a shy or quieter person may have very good self-esteem, whilst a loud and sociable person may actually have low self-esteem. In order to develop good self-esteem you need to get to know yourself properly, as good self-knowledge is the basis for good self-esteem. It is also important to consider when it may be useful to work on developing a personal characteristic that could help improve your self-esteem.
Sometimes we find ourselves thinking and talking with a negative tone: “I can’t do that”, or “I am bad at that”. It’s a good thing if you are able to be demanding of yourself, but if you are too negative it may cause anxiety and damage your self-confidence. Try to make your speech and thinking positive by questioning yourself: Could I do it if I practised? Could I do it another way, using my own strengths? With our thoughts we can easily either discourage or encourage ourselves - would you talk to your best friend like you are talking to yourself? In order to strengthen self-esteem, it is important to be in a community where you get acceptance and encouragement. It’s also important to stand up for yourself and express your own will. Additionally, it is sometimes important to be able to be stubborn and say “no”, as well as express anger and resentment when appropriate.
In terms of self-esteem, it’s helpful to consider whether your own perception of yourself is true.
Turn a feature that you consider to be negative into a positive: For example, can timidness sometimes be tactful, or can anxiety be a precaution? Can loudness be enthusiasm or can courage emerge in different ways? Ask yourself: Am I really the person I make myself or others believe I am? What am I good at and what would I like to develop?
Check out Nyyti’s Life Skills Course (in Finnish): jakso 13: Itsetuntemus ja itsetunto sekä jakso 11: Sosiaaliset taidot. On self-esteem see Nyyti.
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